Are Your Children Safe from Sexual-Abuse and Child-Napping?

Last article we looked at the definition of safe, and the importance of risks in a child’s life for them to grow, and how safety isn’t found in a place but in a Person.
In this week’s article, let’s consider dangers of child-napping, and molestation.
How do I can safe-guard my children from sexual abuse?
Most child-abuse or napping cases are done by people the family knows. Many alleged cases are done by one parent restricting another divorced parent or relative. (Not true abuse cases.)
How do you guard against abuse?
Supervision on your part eliminates the potential environment.

My boys didn’t have sleep overs at others’ houses.
When shopping or visiting, my boys were never out of my sight. (Now, I’m more lenient with the younger ones. They shop separately in the Dollar Store, if we are in our small town and the store’s not busy.)
As a side note: I'm amazed at the number of people I see with their toddlers trailing behind them in a parking lot. I drive slowly in parking lot, (I seem to be one of the few people who do.) I drill my children that they MUST STAY CLOSE TO ME. (And I hold their hand.) Not only for child napping reasons, but for common sense. I tell them, "People don't see little people when they are driving, especially backing up."
When we visited relatives, I allowed no closed doors, no playing upstairs, and only where I can see.
It wasn’t a matter of trusting the relatives, but obedience and security for my children. But in so doing, it gave protection. And I stayed vigilant to watch my children.

If you warn your children about all the specific ways abuse is manifested, evil changes. By telling them what could happen, you instill fear. Their imaginations suggest problems that aren't real and create unhealthy views on their body.
Instead, I prepare the boys with one rule: if we cover it, we don’t talk about it, or let others touch it.
Teach your children truth. Then they will know wrong.

If your child feels uncomfortable with someone, tell him to tell you.

An abuser often selects a vulnerable, lonely, handicapped or struggling child.
Make sure your child can talk to you about anything, anytime.
It’s hard, even as a parent, to tell a relative, “no” they can’t go for ice cream. It seems so harmless.

You seem so overbearing, so restrictive. I was known for that. But I knew my children were safe.
God instills those protective feelings in mothers for a reason. It’s not for the child to know, it’s for the mom to listen. Often I’d ask my husband, he’d override those feelings. I would allow his decision to rest. (And rest in his decision.)
If you aren’t sure, don’t allow them.

An excellent article listing signs of molestation can be found here.

We live in an evil world. The world pushes against our protected home and wants our children.
As parents, we shelter them, creating a place of safety.
This may seem contradictory to the statement from last article, where I said, “Safety isn’t a place.”
But parents do protect against evil by putting up walls. Just as a city’s walls protect from what would attack the city, parents put up walls to protect their children. A fence around a pool is an obvious precaution. A diligent mom is another precaution.

We protect from evil.
But we don’t live in fear of evil.
We keep our walls secure.
Keep the rules in place.
Instill the truth in their hearts.
That doesn’t mean evil won’t happen.
But it does mean, we can be busy doing what God has told us to do. Not worrying about what Satan wants to do to us.

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Michael Pearl had an excellent article on allowing our children to be in youth groups where the other kids are allowed to have cell phones. Much porn is found on phones and too many kids have it without their parents realizing it. It only takes one pictures for your child to have that garbage imprinted on their mind, so be extra vigilante about this.

I write about what you---
women, wives and moms---
about your family, faith and future.
I write about what's hard, what helps and what heals.
I show you how it's done. And not done.
I hold your hand as you find what matters to the Savior.
And let go of those things that mattered to you, but not to Him.
I write about what Him.
               Sonya Contreras

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